These kid's should give up on their dreams

So I know this guy. For the sake of anonymity, let's call him Armeen P (Poor). After graduating from college, when many of his friends entered the Teach For America program to inspire underprivileged children, he courageously chose the path less traveled: to teach a bunch of rich snobs at a private high school where he gets paid lots of money and works very few hours. The rare yet bold "anti-Teach For America." I won't comment on his job choice; he is a history major yet teaches freshman biology and chemistry, so it makes sense. He also coaches freshman basketball, even though his only sports accomplishment to date has been his Freshman Parents-Weekend Table Tennis Championship. And he came off the bench of a high school team that supposedly went 1-26. So you would think that most parents would be happy to pay thousands of dollars a year to have this guy teach your kids and coach them basketball. However, I have two points of contention:

1. In my opinion, an extra credit question on an exam should be used to reward the student who listened closely in class or read the textbook closely. Therefore the question is usually quite harder than the regular exam questions. This is how it should be. It is positive reinforcement for the students who study hard and creates an incentive for the slackers to work harder. Coach P doesn't think so. Here are some of his actual extra credit questions on his biology exams:

Name one of the two varsity sports that Mr. Poor played in high school.

What's Mr. Poor's dog's name?

Superbowl bonus prediction: whoever gets the closest to the real score gets a field goal added on to their score... aka 3 points.

I think this is wrong. This is random and arbitrarily awards points to the students. Coach P thinks that extra credit means "extra to the material." Who is right? I am.

2. I was fortunate enough to witness one of his team's basketball games. The team he was playing against had 7 kids on the team and none of them were above 5 feet. Coach P's team had plenty of kids above 5 feet, including one kid who probably should have been playing varsity. At halftime, his team was up 36-6. His star player was in the game running circles around the other team hitting reverse layups. I felt like this game was going to be a story on Yahoo or CNN, like the Dallas Academy girl's basketball team that lost 100-0. Not only that, but one of his kids was blatently pushing other kids to the ground and throwing elbows. In a freshman basketball game. In the second half. When they were up 40. Here's to you, Mr. Freshman High School Basketball Coach Who Needlessly Runs Up The Score To Make Up For His Lost Childhood Basketball Dreams.

Picture evidence:



Thoughts?

Here is my extra credit question: How many times have I played solitaire on my cell phone? There is a stats button that keeps track of every game so I have an exact number. The closest guess gets a poem written about them in the next post.